Sunday, March 25, 2018

That's what friends are for?

To each their own
We became friends
We are barely friends
That must be how you wanted it to be.
If you ever wonders why I won't
 contact's because you are "too busy" to be a true friend especially when life gets tough.
Thanks for not being there. You showed your true colors.

Thursday, December 7, 2017


Imagine the sound of a old piano playing in the background
The song: Happy Birthday
Played as a beginner

41 years passed by
No cake, no gift,
No happy birthday wishes
Blood drawn for more tests
Family, Friends, and loved ones
All forgot
Does a birthday even matter?
Do I?
Perhaps not for the most part
Another day
Another year
Time vested
Time wasted
Wishing, dreaming, hoping, trying
Working, sleeping, laughing, crying

This year 3 people got the day wrong (early birthday wishes, better than none!)
Only 1 actually remembered.  My own mother.
Of course she would, she birthed me and was by my side so much this year with me being hospitalized, cancer diagnosis, surgery/recovery, and now the Chemo journey.  I can't even imagine how she has felt watching me, her only daughter go through this.  She's not perfect, but she's the exact mom I needed through all of this. Thankful for my mom!
 Bless her!

Thursday, November 9, 2017

The Silence and The Knowing

Passing goodbyes
Passing hello's
Strangers filtering through
Someone once said, "sticking around will kill you"
Oddly it nearly did.
Gave too much of me and my time to people that mentally, physically, emotionally drain the life out of me.
And people wonder why I'm a bit more distant, quiet, and with boundaries! I won't invest my time and energy in to people who take and run. That's not how friendships and relationships work.
Best part of the silence and the knowing, you learn who is a part of your daily life. Those people are not. They disconnect after taking what they need.
Everything I've been through in the past 5 years, not 1 of them has shown to be a true and caring friend. Waking up from surgery and not  seeing any of those folks by my side, says everything about friendship. My children, mother, brother and sister in law are the ones that care.  A real friend doesn't hide. A real friend asks how you are doing in real time.

I survived the draining. I survived cancer. I'm surviving my chemotherapy. I'm surviving without those who took and drained me.
The silence and the knowing.
All the best for everyone in life! <3 p="">

Friday, September 29, 2017

Faith, Hope, & Love

As terrible as the news was hearing I had cancer (surgery removed the tumor) these times are much more successful for us for surviving than 30 years ago.  Chemotherapy is still a frightening process. I can do my best daily, ultimately it's in God's hands.
I pray I made the right decision.

Wednesday, August 30, 2017

The Bid

10 years of their run-around
wordy nonsense
Too much is too much
Even I have a limit
It's there

Wednesday, August 23, 2017


That final straw
No more
Giving benefit to the doubt
No more.

Sunday, August 20, 2017


Let me know
Until then
I'll be over here
or there,
And somewhere